Maybe you’re in SS2 and something has been weighing on you. Maybe you’re a parent wondering what the school counsellor actually does all day. Here’s what to expect, and an honest answer about what stays private.
A school counsellor helps students with schoolwork, subject and career choices, and personal or family problems, and refers them for more help when needed. What you say stays private, unless someone’s safety is at risk or the law requires sharing.
The details depend on your age, your school and the counsellor’s training, so it’s always worth asking at the start. Here’s what to expect.
What a school counsellor does
In plain terms, a school counsellor:
- Helps you choose: your SS1 class, your WAEC subjects, a course and institution for JAMB, and possible careers.
- Helps with school itself: settling in, study habits, exam stress and falling grades.
- Listens to personal problems: friendships, bullying, family trouble, grief, low mood and relationships.
- Runs talks and groups: orientation for new students, career talks and small group sessions.
- Refers you on: to a doctor, psychologist, therapist or child-protection service when you need more than they can give.
- Follows up: checks how you’re doing after a decision or a referral.
Textbooks call these services orientation, appraisal, information, counselling, placement, referral and follow-up. Our guide to what guidance and counselling means explains each one, and why it matters covers the benefits.
A school counsellor isn’t a doctor. They don’t diagnose or treat mental illness on their own, and they can’t prescribe medicine. Their job is to listen, help and make sure you reach the right person.
What you can take to them
| What’s going on | How a counsellor can help | Would anyone else be told? |
|---|---|---|
| Choosing subjects, a course or a career | Information, questionnaires about your interests, talking it through | Usually not, unless you want your parents involved |
| Exam stress or falling grades | Study and coping strategies; a word with teachers if you agree | Usually only with your agreement |
| Friendship trouble or bullying | Listening, problem-solving, help to stop the bullying | Possibly the school, if that’s needed to stop serious harm |
| Problems at home | Listening, help to cope, a family meeting if you want one | Only if you’re at risk of harm |
| Grief, low mood or anxiety | Support, and referral to a doctor or therapist | Possibly a parent, if your safety is a concern |
| Thoughts of harming yourself | Immediate support and getting you proper help | Yes, someone who can keep you safe |
| Someone hurting you | Protection and getting help | Yes, people who can protect you |
The last column is a general guide, not a promise. Each counsellor should tell you how they work.
Who your school counsellor is
Ideally, your school counsellor is a trained counsellor, usually with a degree in guidance and counselling. Many belong to the Counselling Association of Nigeria (CASSON). Under the Counselling Practitioners Council of Nigeria Act of 2022, counsellor posts in government service are meant for counsellors registered with the new council, though its register is still being set up.
In practice, not every school has one. In some schools a teacher fills the role: counsellors surveyed in Adamawa State in 2024 named the use of teachers as counsellors among their problems. We look at the wider gaps in problems of guidance and counselling in Nigeria.
It’s fine to ask, politely: “Are you a trained counsellor?” A good one won’t mind.
Suggested read: Is Guidance and Counselling a Good Course in Nigeria?
What they keep private
The clearest published guidance we could find on school counsellors and privacy comes from the American School Counselor Association, a US professional body. Its position on confidentiality says that:
- a school counsellor’s main duty of confidentiality is to the student, balanced against parents’ legal right to guide their children;
- the counsellor should explain, at the start and in words you understand, what stays private and what doesn’t;
- personal notes should be kept separate from your school records;
- sensitive information should be shared in person, not written into your file or sent by email;
- staff should understand the limits, so teachers don’t expect to hear everything.
In short: what you say about your feelings, your family, your friendships or your choices should normally stay between you and the counsellor.
When a counsellor would share, and with whom
The same guidance lists the situations where confidentiality has limits. A counsellor may need to share information when:
- you’re in danger of harming yourself, or someone else;
- someone is harming you;
- a court orders it;
- they consult a colleague or supervisor to help you, who keeps it confidential too;
- you’re in a group session, where other students aren’t bound in the same way.
A good counsellor tells you before they share anything, explains who they’ll tell and why, and shares only what’s needed. If you’re being hurt, the aim is to protect you, not to get you into trouble. Our guide to when a therapist can break confidentiality covers the same limits in more detail.
Will the counsellor tell my parents?
It depends mostly on your age and what you talk about.
- If you’re under 18, your parents have legal rights to guide you, and a counsellor has to balance your privacy against those rights. Most day-to-day conversations stay private, but if your safety is at risk, involving a parent or another trusted adult is often part of keeping you safe.
- If you’re 18 or over, you’re treated as an adult, so your consent matters far more.
Our guide will my therapist tell my parents? explains what Nigerian law says for under-18s and adults. A good question to ask at your first meeting: “If my parents ask, what would you tell them?”
Will teachers or the principal find out?
In most cases, they shouldn’t learn what you discuss. A counsellor may tell a teacher something only with your agreement, or when it’s needed to keep you or someone else safe, for example to stop serious bullying.
You can also ask practical questions: when you can come without being noticed, whether anyone else uses the office, and what goes into your school file.
For parents: working with your child’s school counsellor
- Expect some privacy. Young people talk more openly when they trust it won’t all go home. A counsellor who keeps your child’s confidence isn’t working against you.
- You’ll be told about safety. If your child is at risk, a counsellor should involve you or another adult who can help.
- Share what helps. A death in the family, a move, an illness or changes at home all help the counsellor understand your child.
- Ask good questions: how your child seems to be coping, what you can do at home, and whether a referral would help.
If you’re worried about your child’s mental health, a family doctor can refer them to a mental health service. If you’d like support for yourself as a parent, you can talk to a family and parenting therapist.
When to look beyond school
If a counsellor refers you to a doctor or therapist, follow it up. It usually means they think you’d benefit from more support than a school office can give. Our guide to therapists, counsellors and psychiatrists explains who does what.
Suggested read: Ethics in Counselling: Principles Every Client Should Know
If you’re 18 or over, including at university, you can find a licensed therapist on Mytherapist.ng or see what support is available to students.
If you or someone else is in immediate danger, call 112 (or 767 in Lagos), or Safe Place Nigeria on 0800 800 2000. The full list of numbers, including child-protection services, is on our helplines page.
Frequently asked questions
What does a school counsellor do? They help students choose subjects, courses and careers, cope with schoolwork and exams, and deal with personal or family problems. They also run orientation and career talks, and refer students to doctors, therapists or child-protection services when needed.
Can a school counsellor tell my parents? Usually not about everyday conversations. But if you’re under 18, your parents have legal rights, and if your safety is at risk, a counsellor will often need to involve a parent or another trusted adult. Ask your counsellor how they handle it.
Can I see the school counsellor without my parents knowing? Most school counselling starts with a student walking in. Whether your parents are told depends on your age, what you talk about and your school’s policy, so ask the counsellor at the start.
Do school counsellors tell teachers what you say? Not normally. Professional guidance says counsellors should keep personal notes separate from school records and make sure staff understand the limits. They may share something with a teacher with your agreement, or to keep someone safe.
What does a school counsellor have to report? A risk that you’ll seriously harm yourself or someone else, or that someone is harming you, and anything a court orders. A good counsellor tells you first and shares only what’s needed.
Is a school counsellor the same as a therapist? Not quite. A school counsellor offers guidance and short-term support in school and refers students on. A therapist, psychologist or psychiatrist provides longer or more specialist care. Of these, only a psychiatrist can prescribe medicine.
